Are Parents Setting Themselves up to Fail?
(Posted on Thursday, October 17, 2019)
I’ll be honest, I have really struggled these last few weeks. Our family has been sick off and on. The kids continue to pass illness back and forth, and it is draining to say the least. We all know how hard it is to get a true sick day as a parent. Most of the time we just end up pushing on at our own expense.
Thoughts have crossed my mind like:
Other parents aren’t losing their cool.
Other parents aren’t crumbling under the pressure.
Other parents aren’t breaking down into tears.
Other parents don’t snap at their child.
I know my situation could be so much worse, but somehow, THEY are still holding it together. Why can’t I?
Sometimes we create this unrealistic standard in our minds based on our assumptions. The pressure to live up to this impossible standard can be paralyzing. This is still a challenge for me even though I hear stories every day where other moms tell me they feel the same way, or where other parents tell me thank you for sharing this (whether it’s here or in my book), because they have been there too! Even still, I struggle with the pressure. I just wanted to share today that the truth is we aren’t alone in our feelings no matter how much it can feel like we are. We aren’t the only parent out there who has lost their cool, snapped, or broken down.
So, here is what I am going to do:
I am going to keep trying to remind myself that I am not alone.
I’m going to remind myself to stop basing my self-worth on assumptions I have made about others and about what I am missing in comparison.
I will continue trying to accept myself for who I am as a person and as a mom.
And, most importantly, I am going to let the tiny reminders I see each day confirm that I am enough and that I’m doing just fine… when my kids smile, when I see them contently playing, when they calm themselves down all on their own, when I see love in their eyes. We know the signs are all there. We just need to watch for them and take note.
I hope you will do these things alongside me.
People ask me a lot, “How do you do it?” People may think, She must have this all together… after all she wrote a parenting book. But the truth is, I don’t! And that is exactly WHY I wrote the book.
I’m tired of us parents feeling alone and feeling like we need to live up to the unrealistic expectation of perfection.
I’m tired of us parents feeling like we are alone.
I’m tired of us parents feeling like we don’t measure up.
It is all based on the lies we allow ourselves to believe (or the lies we tell ourselves) and the assumptions we make.
The truth is, when we try to live up to an unrealistic standard we have created in our minds, we are setting ourselves up for failure!
Let’s break this train of thought down, and be comfortable in who we are. Then, we will truly be able to shine.
If we stop setting ourselves up for failure, we will finally be able to see our success.
Check out my book here: They Say, Not Your Average Parenting Book
You may also enjoy: Bullying Hurts, How to Prevent It and How to Stop It or Author Interview- Lauren Jumrukovski on Blaif Magazine
To learn more about me and by blog, check out: About Lauren